I Fucked Up


The worst thing that could have happened as a result of this keto diet is that I discovered that I can drink and remain in ketosis if I don’t have have a sugary chaser.

The last two nights, Friday and Saturday, I had a bottle of rum each night. I didn’t feel much of a hangover Saturday morning and decided I may as well drink again Saturday night. I had no plans, my friend who was staying with me had some party to go to. I’d be all alone with nothing to do. So why not?

Holy shit today I have maybe the worst hangover I’ve ever had. I don’t even know why. I am so sick, so nauseous, and have been throwing up all day. I didn’t even finish the bottle last night like usual. I don’t understand why it’s so bad. PLUS, it feels like I’ve got another kidney stone. Fuck me.

I’m just laying here on my couch, a complete mess. All the pain I’ve felt over the last few years, all the hangovers, the gout, sore joints, and kidney stones, has been self inflicted. Every single bit of suffering I have endured I have caused. Why the shit do I do this to myself?

To summarize the end of this evening, I hurt, I’m regretful, and
“I cried, Liz Lemon, I cried like a big dumb homo.” – Dennis Duffy

Will I ever learn?

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